Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
Randomize
