i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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