My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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