Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
