The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
