Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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