Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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