I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Randomize
