Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize