The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
