this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Randomize
