Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
