bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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