Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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