She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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