You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
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