I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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