Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?

  (1-805): View more from California

  Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with? (1-805): Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info. http://tfl.nu/n3dd
  Replies (27) Good night (888) Bad night (2882)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  I will die if light touches me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): I will die if light touches me. http://tfl.nu/jner
  Replies (18) Good night (1385) Bad night (793)
• Favorite

  (+52): View more from Mexico

  I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+52): I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore http://tfl.nu/b0tv
  Replies (52) Good night (2961) Bad night (1383)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex" http://tfl.nu/rqj6
  Replies (16) Good night (6405) Bad night (1164)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it? http://tfl.nu/y99r
  Replies (14) Good night (1030) Bad night (4300)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck. http://tfl.nu/4gbf
  Replies (17) Good night (1229) Bad night (3544)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for. http://tfl.nu/k05b
  Replies (7) Good night (3793) Bad night (745)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (307): We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger. http://tfl.nu/ajz2
  Replies (6) Good night (1552) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome. http://tfl.nu/5y9x
  Replies (2) Good night (1177) Bad night (512)
• Favorite

  (728): View more from

  We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (728): We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it. http://tfl.nu/6cc7
  Replies (7) Good night (911) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Did you fuck him in my garden last night?

  (1-847): View more from Illinois

  That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Did you fuck him in my garden last night? (1-847): That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina http://tfl.nu/gy1z
  Replies (11) Good night (1146) Bad night (1689)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying http://tfl.nu/l6qe
  Replies (6) Good night (480) Bad night (821)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation http://tfl.nu/yqvf
  Replies (1) Good night (957) Bad night (340)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital http://tfl.nu/4ljf
  Replies (0) Good night (248) Bad night (422)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  you ever just feel like an organ is failing?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): you ever just feel like an organ is failing? http://tfl.nu/hlg5
  Replies (2) Good night (236) Bad night (223)

Randomize