Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
