Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
When did angry sex become our thing?
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
