D3 body, D1 cock
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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