When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize
