How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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