my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just want nice things and good sex
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
