I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What drink are we having for lunch?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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