Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize
