making cat noises will not fix the situation.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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