she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Randomize
