Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
The air taste purple.
Randomize
