Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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