maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
