I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
Oh god it's open bar.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
