We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
