he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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