I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
