sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize