Cold hands, warm shart.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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