Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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