thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize