do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
