They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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