I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Randomize