Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
