You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I would fuck him just for his dog
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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