I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Randomize
