Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Randomize
