I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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