is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
It's never too late to be topless.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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