I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
