let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
