you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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